Customer: Do I really need an anti-virus application on my computer? My answer: Yes. It’s like a condom for the blind, desperate man you sometimes are. Customer: Then give my blind and desperate ass the best money can buy. Me: Think how you just said that, Paul. No. Don’t say anything. Just […]
More Than Just a Failed Merger
Ring! Ring! Them: Acme and XYL Corporations. How may I direct your call? Me: Hello, Marie. This is Daniel, your computer guy. Is Fred in? I need to speak with him about an over due invoice. I’m sure it just slipped through the cracks, or something. Marie: Oh, Hey, Dan! Sure, I will put your […]
Platform IT work
Ring! Ring! Me: I.T. Department, this is Daniel. Caller: Hi, Daniel! This is Mary with E******. I’m calling about a job we have posted on F**** N******. Me: Hello, Mary. So, tell me about this job. Mary: We need you be on the customer site at 9PM tonight to replace two hard drives in the […]
Bitten by Ransomware
Ring! Ring! Me: I.T. Department, this is Daniel Caller: Hey, Dan! It’s Ryan calling. I’m in a jam and wonder if you can help me out. Me: I will do my best, Ryan. What’s up? Ryan: I got hit with a virus. It encrypted all of my files and it wants to pay with BitCoin […]